Taught to live?

Something is wrong with my heart,i think it was torn apart.

I was taught to be honest,i have always been ,a very few white lies,i have said.
I was taught to be kind,i am.
I was taught to love, i do without expectations.
I was taught to be polite,i am.
I was taught to lead, i do without mastering.
I was taught to learn,i do.
I was taught to smile.i do even when am hurt.
I was taught to be straightforward,i am.
I was not taught to live......i never was.

Story time pals...

The sun was high up in the sky as brighter as ever.It was a monday morning and everyone in the city seemed busy.The school children were on their way to school, each in their own way.Few walking with friends,few riding bicycles,few peeping out from their school buses,and few still at home,crying not to go to school,few thinking of an idea to bunk school.The adults were in a hurry to be at work on time.
Admist the pillows and her doll,there sleeps our two yr old kiddoo heroine saisri, in her bed,softer than the bed,she sleeps and cuter than the doll,she is hugging."saisri! sri kutty ...",here comes her mom sahana calling her child.She sat, near saisri kissed her and slowly embraced her.Saisri woke up in the touch and smiled at her mom lovingly."We are  going to granny home",added her mom.That was a sweet news for saisri.
For saisri,granny's place has always been a wonderland.She will be petted,hugged and fondled by all at home-her aunt,uncle,grandpa and granny, whom she loved so much.There were two cows,dogs,lots and lots of dove, in her granny home.The words,' we are going to granny home',excited her so much,that she allowed her mom to give her  bath and ate  all she spooned without complaining and got ready cheerfully.On her way to her granny's home in the car,saisri kept asking her mom,'Is the cow still there?'in her child language.Her mom smiled and said, " yes  dear."
As soon as the car was parkedin her granny's place,saisri was in the hands of her granny.She hugged her granny and her granny embraced her  and gave all the snacks she had made specially for her.She sat on the sofa eating them,when the voice of her dear cow,"maaaaaa......"attracted her.she ran to the backyard,to the cowshed, to see it.she stood there sometime watching the cow.She was always fascinated towards it,since it was so big and cute for her.Then hearing  the sound of the dogs barking  in the front gate,she went through the garden to the front gate.Her mom and granny who were into serious discussion over a family issue completely forgot her.She stood by the gate ,suddenly she remembered the school at the end of the road.Saisri has always wanted to go to school.'Am got to go...',she thought unaware of her age.A real venture for a 2 yr s old.She ran in to the hall,where her grandpa was busy watching news in Television.,searched for a notebook,she has seen her cousin taking notebooks and  pencil,pen etc to school.Alas! she found a torn cover of a book and still no pen or pencil.She searched her granny bedroom ,what she found was a  eyebrow pencil on the dressing table.'Am done' , she thought with a attitude of a school going kid.She went to the gate and started walking towards the school  carrying her assets of pride-the torn book cover and eyebrow pencil.
Here, she is ,inside the school campus.How she escaped the sight of the watchman and crossed the main road's traffic, god only knows.She was astonished by the school atmosphere,the noise of  the children repeating their teachers and the sight of the children playing in ground in their physical training session.While she was wondering where to go to 'learn like her cousin',the principal and a team of teachers who were on their  routine rounds,saw her.The casual dress,she was wearing and the look she gave and her very little size,made them feel something unusual.They neared our heroine,"Look child,with whom did you come?why you standing here alone?".Saisri replied in her cute voice,"i came to learn like mona,i came alone".The principal and other teachers laughed hearing her innocence and seeing the things she had brought with her to learn-the torn book cover and eyebrow pencil,but soon stopped thinking of the seriousness.When they tried to interrogate her more, to send her safe back home,well we have a turning point,her cousin mona who was playing in the ground saw her and ran to her.She told her  principal,"she is my cousin ,saisri" and turning to saisri,"why you came here???",confused.At this introduction,the principal feeling relieved said,"so, you are her inspiration to learn".They rang her home and intimated the happenings.
Meanwhile,saisri mom,grandparents and everyone at home had become afraid and scared of her 'missing'.And had started searching all over the area.The telephone call relaxed them.They hurried to the school and found saisri sitting in principal's room and having the choclet she gave.Sahana thanked the principal a hundred times seeing her child safe.And when they were about to leave the place after a few formal talks.Saisri asked,"when can i learn like mona?".Everyone laughed and the principal said with her smile,"Next year,my dear".

i am experimenting

guys,you must have seen the other post as well,well,i have tried to tell you guys a story ,which is very much my own.i am never good at proofreading,i can never read what i had wrote or typed again and do editing ,patch up or whatever...I have mentioned earlier,whats my final copy will be my first copy as well.When i sat to post ,i had this idea of writing this story,so i have.Hope its good,if anything,no other you have to bear with.

My kiddoo brothers had finished their exams n they  went to my granny place yesterday for their vacation.It kindled the nostalgia of my vacations in me...wen i was schooling,though i was a very brilliant student ,i always longed for the annual leave n d vacation i wud hav at my granny's  place.My parents used to come wid me n stay a few days in our granny place,n leave me there n return to our city.My granny's place was about 450 kms from our city,v used to  travel either in car or bus,watever it was, i hardly slept durin d travel.I wil be so very excited abt the trip,meeting my grandparents n al my frens out there.
I  was rather a mischievious child than Tom Sawyer or Dennis the menace.i had a long list of frens,a very long list.Almost everyone in d street of my granny's place wer my frens.I was petted by d elders n befriended my age group n leaded those younger to me.i was a tomboy then, me wid my frens of my age used to climb trees,jump over the wall,race in our bicycles,build a house with borken things n old blankets,hold a party in dat house,wich rather had nothing but my cookery set n the party was jus lik party, not the real party ,u must portray dat u ate out of d plate n drunk out f d cups served emptily, n do al such mischiefs,dat drove my grandparents crazy...My grandpa was a police commissioner, n was gruff in his manners,,bt wen it cums to me n my pranks,he never scolded me.I was his pet as wel.But wat my grand parents worried a lot was abt my safety.
In evenings n after sunset ,v always opted to play hide n seek or the ghost plays written by me.I used to narrate the entire story sequence n assign d characters to al.I played d ghost character mostly...i liked to threaten my frens,i stil remember one such play wen al went wel n d ghost entered d situation as narrated,with the ghostly white blanket wrapped n paintings in my face ,my fren swooned...V hav a hearty laugh over it nowadays wen v meet,bt then v got much scared than d gal whom swooned' dat sumthing has happened to her,n it was our crime' .Such wonderfuldays,full of fun n frolic,freedom n al play no wrok at al......vacations are always d special occasions of everyone's life.

Reluctant reading

Have u ever heard of anyone,who sticks to reading a book,though it doesnt interest her,until d eyebal falls out?Wel...if u havnt,from now on,u can say yes.I hav been  readin a novel today,wich was rather very bad ,i hav to say ,it was horrible ya.i jus cudnt stop reading or throw d book jus cos i started readin n wanted to complete it.D more i felt its bad n uninterested, even after reading half the chapters,d more long it took to end:(
After relishing , those yummy poori's ma mom made 4 breakfast,i lay in bed with ma teddy hugged in righthand n d book n left hand,wid soooo much of enthu...bt once i started reading it ,jus felt lik cursing d author n myself for having started reading it.
My eyes are burning out lik anythin now.i guess...,it must b d effect of d content of d novel, and not d continued reading.Watever,My mind is disturbed n haunted stil ,cos of the undesired reading.,and i jus dn get any thought now to post......

Moved re

I visited my friend today,my very dear fren she is.Ma collegemate,she was ma everythin,is n wil b.she knews maself more than i do.It al started casualy, on d first day of college,c happend 2 b seated behind me.she got herself introduced to me.i wasnt pretty much attracted by her.jus sat silent all day waitin for d day to end.At the end of day ,though i had spoken to al gals in d class.i felt some warmth wid her n luckily she stayed near my home n so v went to d college bus together ,got seated next to each other n started talkin...wen d college bus reached closer to our home,v had cum much closer to eachother as wel.N d rest is history u can ask my juniors to my seniors,my princi to office staff,canteen guy to college bus driver,everyone saw us together n if one isnt attending college dat day ,other wil also not.V wer two sweeet cuties always together.Those r d platinum days al happy,fun n  Together......Even once we reach home,we used to text each other til v fall asleep n early n d morning,it wud b her msg dat wud wake me up for d bus.
Years went off n finallly, after four intimate years in our life ,we had to be part by fate.we cudnt see each other daily nor msg or cal like before.U knw wat i cal her once or twice in a month n so does she.Initially it was her work wich kept her away frm me n then it was her marriage ,her hubby n now it d turn of her infant boy 5 months old(a rather chweeeeeeet rival for me;).wel..,Its al n d game.
She has her very own life now, to live,her huby n her child,all need her attention n care,bt stil i knw deep in my heart dat she luvs me d same way n so do i,i luv her more than ever...though we dnt see daily,text each other each second,cal up n talk for hours n are together always .our souls are always together.She is d one who cries wen am in pain n who smiles happily wen sumthin turns out to me wel.My eyes rolled out tears wen i heard d pain she had during her delivery, wich happened to be a scissorian.she had pain for 5 days then too itseems, bt she got a cute baby na out of that pain.Women are gifted in dat instinct.my fren for life she is......

Ahimsa-does it work?

Ahimsa-this word speaks for itself.Lord Gouthama buddha and our mahatma gandhiji lived their life in it.They hav very much showed d ways 2 live life peacefully n happily.Even d munnabhai's n Vasool raja tried to portray it to their level best.But my query is dat does it reaaaly pay off?R v al taught enuf to be gud to al and in particular even to d person,whom hurts u?i guess d answer wud be no...
Ya even i have been not, for many years as a child.whenever someone hurts ,i wil jus give a straight cutoff n jus let them knw,wat they did  or said was wrong.Attimes ,i even tried to take revenge or held on the grudge in ma heart.Wenever my mom used to advise me,i jus used to argue with her to the core.She used to tell me to forgive n forget is better punishment than to oppose.She used to add ,'life is too short to hurt n fight with each other'.i used to give her back  in a stern voice,' wil my heart heal ,if am gonna forgive?afteral d hurt is stil there n wil b there as long as am alive.am i alone gonna live 100 or 1000 yrs, dat i hav to forgive?even i gotta short life,i don wanna bear hurts in dat'.i opted for 'tit for tat' concept.But...guess wat, i never had peace, though i did tit for tat 
And gradually as i grew up,i became matured.My mom's words had an impact on me.I started forgiving ppl who hurted me n though i cudnt forget (since i had a very gud memory),started to stop thinkin of the hurts n focussed only on d relationships watever it  was-fren,brother,father ,dad,aunt,uncle,nephew,cousin,collegemate or watever,i jus valued their relationship.U knw wat ???i realy hav  peaceful mind nowadays.Afteral whoever hurted me whether they realise or not,am not losing my temper,my relationship wid them.Its keepin me happy n peaceful.

Missing IPL...

Everyone in india seems to talk of either the IPL or the  to be held Lok sabha elections.Almost every news channels,press, media etc., just focusses on these two issues.Am little disappointed  as a cricket fan,that the IPL goes to another country-South Africa.A poll shows almost 79%(correct me if am wrong) of the population are disappointed.But it is okay yaar...After all what has to matter us a lot is to organise the IPL-2 successfully and send back all the players safely to their respective homes.
I believe none would have forgot the terror attack in pakistan on the srilankan cricketers and in our very own mumbai-The Taj incident.What we need now is safe gaming not terrific gaming.

We indians, will of course miss our IPL matches in our very own cities,our very own stadiums,our very own kinda cricket:(


It is a sultry afternoon,n here am sittin before my system,obsessed wid lot of thoughts,A lotttt of thoughts.Ironcial ,isnt it?d last time to post ,i  really din hav anythin to say,but today overflow of thoughts.u knw wat, our  thoughts are relative to our moods,so is our mind n creativity.At times, i feel lik am jus up in d sky n jus nothin does matter to me.Watver am asked to do,my ans wud be 'not a big deal',bt attimes even to lift my eyes to see d one who is talkin to me n respond ,it jus takes a huge effort, wel i mean it.Cos  i l b lost n ma own world.
Everyone does stay in der own world n thoght.U n ur fren may be seated next to each other n watching the same movie,wat ur fren sees n interprets n wat u interpret wil b always diff.If u gonna read d same news paper ,u n ur fren,each one wil visualize only those they are familiar wid n intersted in.U may have ur attention on d headlines statin india won d first test cric in NZ,While ur fren who s totally disinterested wid cric,wudnt hav seen d headline it self n wil be reading abt the elections news...it happens,its kinda blindness or visibilty to only to related issues.
watver... am in ma own world,carried of by ma thoughts...

dn hav anythin to say......

ds s my 6 th post,n suddenly,n so very soon,i feel like i jus don hav anything to say...very bad thought.'um,y is it i don hav anythin to say or write?',the question keep running in my mind.wel,i don hav d answer,i reaaaaaaly dont.


Of late i read a story ,wich haunts me still.It was a story of a woman who feels al lonely due to her hubby's one word replies 2 her queries.i think probably lot of women in india do face such situations n living their entire life in such scenario.Wat pitiable creatures?V woman always bear al d troubles n pain for  d relationship,bt has it ever been understood?
Its us who give al our luv ,care n affection without any expectations.Bt attimes v too want it to be reciprocated n jus wan our man to let us know how much he cares for us,he wil always  be ther for us n want him 2 spend few  special moments for us.do al d guys do dat?Wel i dnt think so.Quite a lot ,he wil be busy, we need to understand dat.At times he wnt be able to respond to us properly, many of our queries wil go unanswered,its okay.Bt y u dnt let us know u care,a few moments of real affection,afteral v r bound to live together,n am ur best friend.Y not?
If d gal is gonna say anything out of stress is it Sarcasm? My dear she is tryin to get ur attention,She luvs u a lot,U r her world,her happiness revolves around u.Even if she is in a Golden palace,wears d best of dresses n ornaments,its ur luv  c values a lot.
U hav d the warmth n touch to keep her happy n young always n only U hav......

R u criticised?

Did u ppl ,find ma last script intersting?wel i dint much.i had a comment wat yu upto,n d conclusion n title wer captivating ,kinda truth.Whoever, tanx 4 d comment.i personally wasnt much satisfied wid dat article.U knw wat i generally start writing in ma own flow of thoughts n have never edited anything,wat wil b my final copy,wil b ma first copy as wel,am used to it.1 of ma fren asked me to write on friendship n so i fixed d title, started writing,din feel much comfortable,i edited thrice n posted n d article stil dint cum satisfactory.May b if  i had published ma first copy it wd hav been more captivating.Jus wanted to say dis cos,v hav 2 b always ourself,u can hear  other's opinion ,bt wat our heart says must b d decision.Correct if am wrong n if u guys feel last script was equally good.
Being a gal n her twenty's,i often cum across lots of Queries wich i feel lik askin,so jus wanted to share it here.u gals out ther ,al most al must hav come across dese wordings'u r no more a kid,behave urself'.Havn't u?i do many times.i hav a teddy ,a very cute one,wich i keep wd ma self attimes,jus note attimes i had comments ,'y u do u wanna act lik kid?','dnt pretend 2 b a kid'.Pardon me,its ma very own teddy n wil keep it wd me ,even if am n my sixties.Am not tellin dis out rudely ,jus consider ma feelings too.Am jus a growing up gal,or young woman or watever.
Sumtimes i really get confused if i have to behave lik a grown up or growing up.Cos der r lot of situations in wch d society treat u as a kid ,n jus keep tellin' u r too young to decide or to talk or to be lik dis'.Den y shud nt i keep ma teddy wd me wen i want?Am damn confused...My dear Society wat u want out of ds little woman,to be ur slave? to abide by ur words?NOPE,dn expect me to be,i wil nt,Its ma very own life,i wil live it to ma heart content.Even i do have responsibilites of keeping up d family's name,Our culture n al,i wil abide by it,bt nt by ur RULES.V indian Gals,brought up in tamil culture wil always try to bring in Pride to the family n a gud reputation.So jus leav us by ourselfs,evenif  v dnt bring u pride,wil atleast hav the content of venturing towards our dreams n happiness.
D critics of d society doesnt cum only from d elder age ppls,bt do cum from our own frens as well,d ppl of our age group.An acquaintance,i hav to cal her as my fren only,cos i dnt consider anyone as ma foe,told me ma blog s rather scripted a lot,no links,no images,no quotes n much more ,c told me ,ma RSS feed s very simple n dat it wnt attract readers.Jus wanna reply her n ds article.My dear fren ,am not Rude,am not Impatient,am not Hasty,bt ppl lik u make me so ,very often,even ma yogasana's n meditation doesnt help me out to control ma temper wen u pest's talk to me lik ds.I have been tellin, its ma Style,i wil write lik dis n dis wil be ma RSS feed.D readers hav to be attracted in ma words not n d links nor d images or watever.hope u understood my dear fren.
Uuuuuuuuf,i think i got realy nuts talkin abt those frens of mine,sorry guys ,it drove me mad n anger,feelin much more relieved now.My dear Readers,i know am jus buidling up ma blog n fans,n follwers,if u feel contented reading ma blog,n if ma words really attract u ,pls do let me know,am jus dyin  to hear such words......

Yeah ppl,ds article is on Friendship.The most valued n treasured relationship for everyone regardless of age.From grannies to Kindergarten kids,everyone in dis world want frens,luv their frens n jus cant imagine life  widout them.Its wid our buddies dat we share all our stupid to mindblowing thoughts, our dreams,our secrets n al tat v cant share wid our mom,dad,bro,sis n even huby.

For almost everyone mom wil b d 1 n best fren forever,its with her v start our life in ds world,play our 1 game,share our 1st secret n everythin,c s obviously d best close friend 4 al.Bt as v grow up v start hiding things to her n share our thoughts to our frens,u wud seen many kids carryin a doll altime,treatin it as best friend,feeding it,playin wid it,talkin to it n even complaining to it.Its kinda imaginary friendship ,wch the kid thinks abt the doll.Once the child s into kindergarten,school obviously gets lot of real frens n few frens remain forever in our life.few frens r jus passing clouds.

If u hav got true goodfrens hu care 4 u,luv u ,accept u as wat u r,hu stay wd u watever d situation is ,then u r d most luckiest person n ds world.Am luckiest too,i hav lots n lots of frens who r wd me n r ma well wishers.If u gonna count those intimate close frens wid whom i share al ma tots dey wil itself b more than twenty .i had a fren to take care of me,wen was sick.i had a fren to correct me wen i was wrong.i had a fren to make me smile,wen i was n tears.i had a fren to make me understand ma abilities wen i felt am lost.i even had a fren to make me understand everyone wil not be d same always n life.u knw wat i made frens n al walks of life,wid ppl of al status.i never had any superiority complex wen i was above them,or inferiority wen i was below them,bt one particular fren,whom i hav seen n her worst stages of life,n who s doing well now,hurted me few months on a sensitive issue,u knw wat, c made me cry n c made me understand wats life, n dat ppl r nt d same always,n hw innocent i hav been thinkin.n d worst part of it was c reacted as if c never knew dat c hurted me r am hurt...wel dats life,c s ma fren after all, i forgot dat hurt,bt nt d incident still.Well its obvious n any relationship no one can b cent per cent perfect n al wnt b gud to u always., "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his

friends."(John 15:13).these are d words of jesus christ.Awesome na.Even in our gr8 indian epics der r lots of characters wich reveal pure friendship n d one dat cums dat strikes ma mind instantly s d gr8 karnan, i hav always admired karnan for his friendship,kindness,braveness n al ,jus for hs friend duryodana ,he died,he is reaaaaaaaly gr8,his friendship is pure.

Well u cant expect ur fren to die for u in dis era,well wil u do tat?or wil i do?No exaggerations,no one wil,bt dats not wats needed.frens r for life,to live life.

So cherish frens,Nourish frenship.

Frens r 4 life,attimes dey r d LIFE




Surrender urself 2 d almighty

Have u guys ever felt afraid or worried of ur future? i guess most of us wud answer S.yeah its obvious n al age group whether u r 13 r 30 r 60 cos every1 has some desires r dreams n eyes 2 b fulfilled r achieved.N do u search 4 ur god wenever u r n trouble r prob?buddy dats reaaly bad.u must luv n cherish ur god n ur best n worst times equaly.Cos he knws wats gud 4 u,n wen 2 giv u wat.After al he s d 1 who created us on dis world,everythin happens cos of d almighty.
Incase if u r n atheist,u must b believin in science ryt?yup,mankind originated due to darwinism,bt even to dat evolution process 2 occur,wer do u think d cells originated?who created them?okies if u gonna tell hw cell originated on earth ,who created d earth ,sun ,moon our galaxy,n al other galaxies n al?Known is a drop ,unknown is an ocean. der must b sum power ryt?n dat power v presume as god -d Almighty
D almighty knows wat al v do,our tots,our actions n everythin ,So b true to urself n to al around u.Do not show hatred on anyone.Luv ur mom,ur family ,ur frens, ur life n most importantly urself unconditionally.Cos true luv creates happiness in u n around u.Wen u luv d almighty n others u wnt get angry , u wil find a lot of change within u  n around u.
Every1 wl b n luv either on family or on frens, or on work or watever,bt if u jus tel n words u r n luv nbt n action u jus want it to be reciprocated or demand sumthn or jus want ur almighty whom u luv or ur mom or ur fren to take care of u n ur wishes alone,u can no longer tell u luv ur god or others,cos u very much luv urself only n reaaly very selfish.plssssss dnt.
Wel i guess am talkin lik a philosopher may b influence my man ,my sai n al
Ds article s to understand d real peace n happiness one gets wen u surrender urself to ur almighty.Cos u dn hav anymore responsibilities n ur hands,he s d ONE.So jus give ur heart n soul to watever u do,work smart n leave t to ur Almighty.He wil rock more than u expected n wanted,Believe me it works......Lets make our life Easier,Surrender 2 D almighty
Jai sai ram

Here goes my

Hey ppl...

U r n d pages of d future rock star of blogs ,gr8 copy writer of famous sites n most popular women writer.Being my 1st blog jus don wanna write on sensitive issues.U can expect blogs on al topics under the sky in future need to do lot of referals...lol

Ma blog wnt b n d typical style f al blogs,it wil b absolutely n ma own style.u can chk ma blog 4 al those freakin thoughts of a little woman,wanna b writers,home makers, gals n luv,growin up gals n ethnicity,creativity,bein gal n al stuff 4 gals.

I dedicate dis blog 2 my Sai ram ,my Life,n al gals out there.

So keep smilin,tc,ciao

Note:al media ppl out ther,do start keepin ur attention n my blogs frm now itself,so in future u wnt have to read the archives to understand hw i started